Whenever I come across the word ‘addiction’, the face of a helpless, apathetic fourteen-year-old boy pops up in my mind. I met that boy in a de-addiction centre in Mumbai; he was struggling to cope with his addiction to substances and his audio hallucinations. That is, he heard things in his ears which asked him to do specific tasks and things (no, not like in films or novels). During some group therapy sessions and case studies, I got hold of his story, and it was heartbreaking.
The boy lost his father at a very young age. His father and his brothers were alcoholic and abusive and fought often, even on petty issues. His mom was a homemaid who worked in a nearby apartment and was busy keeping her livelihood intact. She married again when the boy was seven, and the stepfather was not good to him. The environment he grew up in was not nourishing, and his desperation for validation and care made him fall into the company of other slum children who were taking drugs. He explained honestly that at the age of eleven, how the drugs and other substances made him feel good and excited during the initial stages of use.
Slowly, he wanted it more and more and could not do anything without the intake of those substances. He started stealing money from his stepfather, uncles and grandmom. He sold the only piece of gold earrings his mother possessed to buy the drugs. Most of the time, he was caught and beaten up for stealing and using illicit drugs, but nothing stopped him. He could not pass a day without those substances, and there was no money to buy every time.
He started looking for cheaper means to satisfy his urges and cravings. He snorted the ink of pens, other liquids, or some other nasty things- anything that came his way to get over his terrible withdrawals. He felt good when he experimented with snorting the glue fevicol, but it was not cheap. In his desperate quests, he found the cheapest version of glue that was used by cobblers. His neighbour was a cobbler and the boy started to steal the glue, which was used to stick the sandals. One day, the people of his slum found him in a nearby dirty canal and took him to a hospital, and he ended up in that de-addiction centre.
There is a vast missing passage in his story, such as his memory, speaking, thinking, and overall cognition; everything was affected by the usage of substances. I remember him staring at the ceiling with a despairing look for hours. I wondered what he was experiencing in those moments at that tender age! Sometimes, he told the counsellor his ears were paining because a demon was talking to him non-stop (his auditory hallucinations). Another time, he said an angel or a God-like figure spoke to him. He was withdrawn most of the time from reality and had shown suicidal and self-harming tendencies. He had no sense of smell or taste and showed no emotion. He sat anywhere sluggish and slothful and looked pale and sick. One could never see any vitality or life in that boy. His dead-eye gaze haunted me, which was completely blank and lacked expression. I felt as if I was looking at the eyes of a dead fish, and a melancholic situation arose each time.
The boy went through the rehabilitation process of three months at the de-addiction centre, but many of his psychological problems remained with him. For some following months, his mom brought him for follow-ups, and then they vanished into thin air. I do not know whether he is using drugs again, I do not know if he got any help from a professional, I do not know whether he can lead a normal life, and I do not know whether he is alive or not.
This is one of the stories I want to tell to all those youngsters who wish to try substances for a high. It does not take much time to turn tables, and become a lifelong addiction.
When we talk about addiction, what comes to mind is alcoholism and drug abuse. Are these two the only addictions? Aren’t our brains addicted to something or other? Other than drug or alcohol dependence, our brains get addicted to many different things or behaviours.
Do you know that experts say sugar is as addictive as cocaine? Scary!
There are many kinds of behavioural addictions, like gambling and hoarding. Food addictions, social media addictions, exercising/ dieting addictions, shopping addictions, internet addictions, sex addictions, etc., that trigger our brain area of reward circuit, which gives an elation and thus the repetition and the addiction. The dopamine surge makes one feel good because humans are biologically motivated to seek rewards and pleasure.
Addiction is a complex condition which is the result of our brain chemistry changing. Watch out for any substance or activity/habit that makes you feel obsessed with it, craving more of it, thinking more about it, obtaining more of it. You may want to stop, but you cannot, which makes you feel guilty. Addictions impact the overall health and well-being of a person and their surroundings.
Addictions do not happen only in dysfunctional families but to anyone at any age. Do not delay the treatment plan if you or someone you love is addicted to something. There are no one-fit-solutions for all addictions; but there is hope to the path of recovery.
Would you like to tell your story regarding addiction, struggle, recovery and triumph? Contact us or talk to us
-Habeeba Waseem, Founder & Life Coach, MindsOnFleek